Everything Wrong With Jupiter Ascending In 19 Minutes Or Less

  • katma 18 Ağu 2015
  • Jupiter Ascending. If you saw it, you hate yourself. If you didn't, you're one of the lucky people who can carry on with life as normal. It's a sinful motherf*cker.
    Remember, only ONE sins video per week until October. But we'll have some stuff for Thursdays here and there as well.
    Remember, no movie is without sin. Which movie's sins do YOU want to see recounted?
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  • Film ve AnimasyonFilm ve Animasyon

YORUMLAR • 7 146

  • 1990cb7 Honda
    1990cb7 Honda 2 saatler önce

    CNN is shit and ran by low life disgusting assholes. Nobody with a brain believes anything they report

  • Amethyst Stone
    Amethyst Stone Gün önce

    The problem with Mila Kunis is the fact that no matter what character she plays I can’t see her as anyone BUT Mila Kunis!

  • Winter Dark
    Winter Dark Gün önce

    "Men do not like smart women"
    That's racists

  • MX TW
    MX TW Gün önce

    This movie is........dog shit

  • David Morse
    David Morse Gün önce

    I liked this movie.
    And I thought the laser skates were cool.
    And Mila Kunis is gorgeous enough to erase any number of sins!

  • cinnamonbearcdc
    cinnamonbearcdc 2 gün önce

    There may be something wrong with me. I actually watch these to see if some movies are interesting. You guys make me laugh but I share your love of taking them apart.

  • keeganshigh
    keeganshigh 6 gün önce

    There could be a billion Mila kunis' and you still couldn't even catch a whiff unless you went Bill Cosby on the situation.

  • Read Love Listen
    Read Love Listen 8 gün önce

    LOL I enjoyed this movie..

  • Taylor
    Taylor 9 gün önce +2

    You seriously think CNN is factual lmfao

  • Harry Woko
    Harry Woko 9 gün önce

    better film than a lot of shite ive seen

  • Joel Louzy
    Joel Louzy 10 gün önce

    LOL Seriously i move from movie to movie to put me to sleep, and this one was on my top list after my second time of watching it. Along with all the new star wars movies marvel and dcu movies.

    • Joel Louzy
      Joel Louzy 10 gün önce

      Honestly couldn't she have bought a better cheaper telescope than her dad had used 20 some years ago and probably had it for 20 or 30 years before that? For $1000 bucks you can get telescopes that hook up to your computer and will automatically find any celestial body you want. Add another 1500 dollars and you can purchase some serious amateur astro gear.

  • Wise Guy
    Wise Guy 12 gün önce

    You obviously have never been to our 'modern day' 2019 DMV. Still a long fucking line!

  • Good Messenger Jennifer 2.0/Malak

    Thank you. Repent. Jesus loves you.

  • AJ Moore
    AJ Moore 16 gün önce

    "Bee's don't Lie"

  • Mark Ukrainetz
    Mark Ukrainetz 16 gün önce +1

    I went through this entire review, yet I have no idea what the movie was about.

  • Kate Hensley
    Kate Hensley 23 gün önce

    Dik-dik is pronounced xylophone

  • Mehatestaxes
    Mehatestaxes 24 gün önce

    HOW did kunis end up on the waves ? dark and UGLY in a BIG WAY ! She's like 3ft tall. I didnt see it because of HER !

    1,897,668 views 24 gün önce +1

    no idea how kunis ended up in this. I believe 100% that's why this movie flopped. I know I didnt go to see it when I saw her in this. She's dark, ugly and short.

  • S P
    S P 24 gün önce

    greek=wannabe whites.

  • S P
    S P 24 gün önce

    Movie bombed because kunis is greek and UGLY ! Looks like a dark towel head.

  • Tô Diệp Khanh
    Tô Diệp Khanh 26 gün önce

    Eddie Redmayne explained that Balem suffered a throat injury, that's why he use that breathy-on-death bed voice. The Wachowski just didn't show it.

  • Geo Proctor
    Geo Proctor 27 gün önce

    Would of been easier to tally the good, like the credits; 23 seconds, 30 tops, should be enough for your intro and closing.

  • kurt dean
    kurt dean 28 gün önce

    This counts as watching a movie

  • Mrrp
    Mrrp 28 gün önce

    This was one of the first movies I was able to recognize myself, as shit.

  • heygeno1951
    heygeno1951 29 gün önce

    CNN reporting ?... ahHHHahahaHHahaAAA..... ( yeah... _your laugh_ ) all they report is fake news about Trump....

  • Paul S
    Paul S 29 gün önce

    Last time I checked "women" is not a race.

  • Free Man
    Free Man Aylar önce

    Cinema Sins did you stutter.
    Sinema Sins.
    Sin-ema Sins.

  • Lynn Gaffney
    Lynn Gaffney Aylar önce

    So I am super late to this CinemaSin, but when Mila references 27B/6 at 12:45 in the video, I'm pretty sure it's not that she read up on anything as much as she's referencing to either the movie Brazil or a George Orwell factoid......but I could be looking waaaaaay deeper into it than I need to.

  • DanGan808 Ella
    DanGan808 Ella Aylar önce

    Mila Kunis simulates what it’s like when guys see Mila Kunis 🤣

  • Dreamwalk Baby
    Dreamwalk Baby Aylar önce

    lmoa. This is one the funniest videos I've ever seen on youtube!

  • eddohan
    eddohan Aylar önce

    Based on a true story!

  • michael kelley
    michael kelley Aylar önce

    Is it weird that “this dude not only shops at Walmart, but actually waits in line there?” was what stood out most to me?

  • Lawrence F
    Lawrence F Aylar önce

    hahah 3:56 comment

  • wanderingbutnotlost
    wanderingbutnotlost Aylar önce

    Thumbs up for the Firefly reference! Mal was who I thought of when you said 'The Verse'.

  • CogitoErgoCogitoSum
    CogitoErgoCogitoSum Aylar önce

    So why dont you count scenes stolen from other films as sins in their own right?

  • Commando303X
    Commando303X Aylar önce

    "Everything Wrong with 'Jupiter Ascending'" would need to be a 127-minute-long project.

  • Gerardus Poppel
    Gerardus Poppel Aylar önce

    It is said this good have been an great movie.

  • Ben Rowan
    Ben Rowan Aylar önce

    Anyone else notice the Keepers look like mini versions of the Silence from Doctor Who?

  • Jonathan Garcia
    Jonathan Garcia Aylar önce

    Concerning that transformers sin, don't forget that UBS building.

  • ValueOfNothing
    ValueOfNothing Aylar önce

    I think you missed a few things.
    Like everything else in this movie.

  • Trevor Fraley
    Trevor Fraley Aylar önce

    gambit call was off

  • Jessika Danielle
    Jessika Danielle Aylar önce

    So glad I never watched this movie

  • CrookedShorts
    CrookedShorts Aylar önce

    FTL = Faster Than Light

  • Sarah I
    Sarah I Aylar önce


  • Foamy Butt86
    Foamy Butt86 Aylar önce

    I thought I had depression then I found Cinema Sins.

  • Pip Koal
    Pip Koal Aylar önce


  • Robert Jensen
    Robert Jensen Aylar önce

    nooooo thats SEXIST not RACIST lol

  • Emmanuel Ofori-Kuragu
    Emmanuel Ofori-Kuragu Aylar önce

    2:51 example. Star Wars

  • Limely -
    Limely - Aylar önce +1


  • Camden Pyne
    Camden Pyne Aylar önce

    14:43 “a year from now” lol, bold of you to assume fox knows what the hell it’s doing. More like four, minimum.

  • Elle Fermoy
    Elle Fermoy Aylar önce +1

    I wish jennifer lawrence played this. Lol

  • Chicken Permission - Checking In

    I never saw this movie, now thanks to CinemaSins I won’t have to.

  • ScissorMeTimbers
    ScissorMeTimbers 2 aylar önce

    Why the fuck is the end goal so often a woman's "true love?" Shut the fuck up, woman. There's always, *always* more at stake than some bitch's feelings. Who fuckin cares lol
    "Eternal intergalactic warfare on a universal sc-"
    "Where's my hot maaan? He has to be hot cuz I'm a princess. Where's? My? *MANSLAVE?!"*
    "The entire cosmos will be blinked out of existence if we don-"
    "Uuumm... do I look like I care about Cosmo? Reading is for icky nerds."

  • Jason Joseph
    Jason Joseph 2 aylar önce +1

    This movie is so bad that it is hard to watch this video talking about how bad the movie is.

  • Pyra Gorgon
    Pyra Gorgon 2 aylar önce +2

    What an idiotic movie. Glad I watched the sins of it rather than wasting my life watching the movie in its entirety.

  • Matilda Muller
    Matilda Muller 2 aylar önce

    Also, poor Eddie

  • Matilda Muller
    Matilda Muller 2 aylar önce

    Hey, finally a Warhammer reference from this channel lol

  • ThatgirlMia :D
    ThatgirlMia :D 2 aylar önce +1


  • Tash
    Tash 2 aylar önce

    I enjoyed this movie up until just now...

  • Alejandra Gonzalez
    Alejandra Gonzalez 2 aylar önce

    Definitely self ears
    7:18 I hate his face

  • Jade Bryan
    Jade Bryan 2 aylar önce

    The reason Eddie redmayne was speaking like that was because his character is supposed to have had his larynx ripped out.

    • Jade Bryan
      Jade Bryan Aylar önce

      I just love him so much that I need to always defend him lmao. It’s my instinct.

    • David Weber
      David Weber Aylar önce

      ​+Jade Bryan Agreed. Like I said, given his immense talent this would seem to be the result of the directors' choices.

    • Jade Bryan
      Jade Bryan Aylar önce

      David Weber
      I really like his acting. Not really in this movie but in things like fantastic beasts and the danish girl. I think he did the best he could with the character he got.

    • David Weber
      David Weber Aylar önce

      Didn't know lack of larynx meant bad acting, too. He won Worst Supporting Actor at the Golden Raspberry awards, although in his defense I'm guessing he was directed that way.

  • Ryan Elfen
    Ryan Elfen 2 aylar önce

    Everything wrong with Shawshank Redemption

  • wildthing1982
    wildthing1982 2 aylar önce

    Apart from stealing ideas from other movies they also stole at least two musical themes : one that suspiciously sounds like “I, robot” and one that even more suspiciously sounds like “Nero sighted” in the JJAbrams “Star Trek” (1st Movie of the new franchise/timeline)...

  • F U N Y U N
    F U N Y U N 2 aylar önce

    @7:05 CNN?👈🤣
    It would've been even less believable then.
    CNN is fake news.
    Anyone else would've been more credible.

  • Banai Feldstein
    Banai Feldstein 2 aylar önce

    Wait, didn't she go back to cleaning toilets again at the end? How was that not a sin when this video even showed her saying she hated her life?
    Or was that another crappy movie? I really didn't remember much of this one.

  • Monique Lawrence
    Monique Lawrence 2 aylar önce

    Sounds similar to the plot of Sailor moon

  • Zengetzu slayer
    Zengetzu slayer 2 aylar önce

    Actually in the video about 3:38 minutes in when he said that men don’t like smart women isn’t racist it’s sexist

  • Sharpnova
    Sharpnova 2 aylar önce

    fucking hilariously bad movie. great video

  • Peter Gruhn
    Peter Gruhn 2 aylar önce

    The outer space aliens live in Bilbao, Spain?

  • Coop Gaming
    Coop Gaming 2 aylar önce

    Strategy = shit

  • Albert Lecter
    Albert Lecter 2 aylar önce


  • Monsterbird Nation
    Monsterbird Nation 2 aylar önce

    When you said "Lost World Jurassic Park" during the Cornfield scene you should have said "Signs"

  • Chris Neufeld
    Chris Neufeld 2 aylar önce

    There’s only so many ways this movie could’ve been better than what it became... 🙄

  • Chris Ducat
    Chris Ducat 2 aylar önce

    This film has Channing Tatum behaving in a sexy manner...all your arguments are invalid :-P

  • Mike Carlson
    Mike Carlson 2 aylar önce

    Mila Kunis will never make sense to me as any glamorous character because family guy

  • thomas sky438
    thomas sky438 3 aylar önce

    You need to give few sins for the part that guy jump on the ship and they go to outer space and a wrap hole and he is good.
    I mean come on how did he survive space and warp hole for all that time when they are flying in space, later on when he got toss out of the airlock he can’t breathe 😂

  • Mc Slaggers
    Mc Slaggers 3 aylar önce

    Half of the sense8 cast is in this

  • Valerie Bendel
    Valerie Bendel 3 aylar önce

    what about that scence where she takes out a pad and fucking applies it with the sticky side down on him??
    That is for sure NOT gonna soak any blood up Have you ever used a pad, girl?

  • Megiddo Jones
    Megiddo Jones 3 aylar önce

    Mila wanted to have sex with a guy who's part animal. Degenerate.

  • MrVlandus
    MrVlandus 3 aylar önce


  • Cerus98
    Cerus98 3 aylar önce

    It’s her fathers telescope. It’s even explained in the movie. I swear you guys do that shit just for comments.

  • Warren Von hilder
    Warren Von hilder 3 aylar önce

    Um. She's playing a Ukrainian.

  • Lisanna Black
    Lisanna Black 3 aylar önce

    Is it too late to say I kinda enjoyed the movie......?
    I mean the special effects honestly weren't as bad as they sound like and looks pretty awesome on a big screen! So are the cg backdrops!
    The plot did suck...but I mean, did you seriously come into this movie thinking you'll get any kind of plot at all???

  • john cameron
    john cameron 3 aylar önce

    Thank goodness I didn't see this movie

  • Pandatomik
    Pandatomik 3 aylar önce

    I litteraly watched this movie thinking it was jhon carter

  • Greywind92
    Greywind92 3 aylar önce

    this movie was fucking awful, idk how they roped these actors into it. Must have been contract bullshit.

  • Fight The Fat
    Fight The Fat 3 aylar önce

    Not going to sin that Jupiter is the god of the gods and lightning? Aka male well I guess it is current year

  • Deadly Raver
    Deadly Raver 3 aylar önce

    lol@ CNN coverage. Lord how THEY have fallen over the years right?

  • Nysythic
    Nysythic 3 aylar önce

    I'm not sure the Wachowski's understand astrology. Jupiter rising at 23º ascendant...this fucking sentence makes no sense. Rising and ascendant are the same thing and it applies to signs not planets. I'm surprised they didn't go into houses and fuck up there too.

  • JSB
    JSB 3 aylar önce

    To be fair, if this movie had been called Laser Skates I probably would have been more tempted to watch it.

  • JSB
    JSB 3 aylar önce

    Ah, the always upcoming Gambit movie. It was so much fun not seeing that film.

  • Denise Allison Stout
    Denise Allison Stout 3 aylar önce

    So glad I passed on that one!!

  • San Ehrhardt
    San Ehrhardt 3 aylar önce

    Shut up meg

  • Vann Wood
    Vann Wood 3 aylar önce

    I nominate CostCo.

  • Vann Wood
    Vann Wood 3 aylar önce

    Jupiter doesn't know how languages work.

  • Aeryn Kelly
    Aeryn Kelly 4 aylar önce

    I actually enjoyed this movie (in no small part due to Mila) but honestly I spent the entire time going "man, I really want to read this book, because I bet I'd understand it better" only to find out there IS no book and it's just a bunch of nonsense.

  • Ingrid Dubbel
    Ingrid Dubbel 4 aylar önce

    How is men not liking smart women seen as a racist line? Sexist, yes. Racist, no.

  • JohnnyCageBanger Productions

    Lmfao the writing on this channel is genius.. the “verse” joke was gold

  • Rory O'Brien
    Rory O'Brien 4 aylar önce

    i feel like this entire movie was a middle finger to adam smith

  • The Ginger Gyrl455
    The Ginger Gyrl455 4 aylar önce

    My husband and I saw this a theater. He enjoyed it. I was stunned and confused. Sean Bean usually=awesome but um nope...It was a strange, rainy evening and I'm still not over it.